In The Zone, Part One
Picture a man going a journey through a dimension, a dimension not only of sight and sound, but of mind games. A journey into a wartorn land whose boundaries are those of T-walls and razor wire. That's the signpost up ahead...CAUTION, you are now leaving the secured area. Beyond this point are people who want to kill you...Have a Nice Day. He has left the trailer park, and entered the Twilight Zone.
They say there is no rest for the weary...and this has not been more true in my life than when my Son was first born. Seriously...he didn't sleep for more than ten minutes at a time for the first four days of his precious ADHD filled life. (I should have made the diagnosis then...) My wife was exhausted after FORTY-ONE HOURS of labor, and then being the only one who could breast feed the most hungry child on the planet...well, lets just say we all had seen more restful days.
But that's not what this story is about.
I have lately been in the second most exhausted period of my life...since my Son's first week on planet Earth. It started about a week and a half ago...when I went in to the Palace to start my shift, like usual. When I arrived, I found an E-mail waiting for me.
As the Senior NCO in my section, I have the advantage of being asked to do things that some of the junior soldiers don't get to do. This is both a blessing and a curse. A blessing, because it allows me to do some really cool things out here. A curse because...it allows me to do some really cool things out here.
One of these cool things, as said E-mail explained, is that I get to accompany a team consisting of a Colonel a Major, an SES (which is the civilian version of a General) two translators, and Iraqi Army contingent Consisting of a General and at least two other Field grade (Colonel) officers...as they go all over Iraq and inspect certain Companies within the Iraqi Army.
Note that I am the ONLY Enlisted man to go. This is explained by the SES as follows:
"I want a Senior NCO to go, because they see things that officers don't. They look at things in a way that an officer can't. I also want a Senior NCO with 'operational' experience, and who can represent the United States in a way that impresses the Iraqis and gives us a good face...by the way, how good a shot are you?"
So...after reading the E-mail that said I get to join this distinguished team on their journey to inspect three of the ten Iraqi Army Divisions, and flipping out a little bit...I was told, "Oh...you aren't going, don't worry about it."
It was later that I learned not to listen to things unless they come directly from someone directly involved in the mission. I worked my whole shift...from ten p.m. until five thirty in the morning, when the SES came in. That's when my magical mystery tour began.
"Ready to go?" he asked with a huge smile.
"Huh?" (Well, it sounded like a completely valid response at the time.)
"Yeah, Flight leaves at seven there, so you need to be over at the airfield at six thirty," he explained.
"Um, but I...uh...was told...that, eh...I wasn't going on this one," I eloquently stated. (It was a matter of sheer confusion and lack of sleep that contributed to my outward appearance of over eagerness...)
"Who told you that?" The SES asked. "I said I want you to go...so you are going."
This gave me an hour to leave the palace, walk (or sprint...whatever) the quarter plus mile back to my trailer, pack for a four day trip, let my Wife know I was leaving, get my gear, and get to the airfield another quarter mile walk away. No sweat.
I went down and called my wife immediately. It was not easy, but I think the sudden...no notice technique helped both of us by not giving us time to flip out too much. I was leaving the relative safety of the "Highly Fortified Green Zone" and heading out into the "Red." As I have said before...I don't pretend that I am not much safer here in the Green Zone, and I don't pretend that safe is not comfortable for me and my family.
There was no possible way to tell her how much I love her. There just aren't enough words to do it. I knew she would worry until I could tell her that I was back in the Palace and safe...but that there was nothing I could do to quell that worry.
"What do I tell the kids?" she asked.
"That Daddy loves them, and he is sorry that he can't talk...but he is on a camping trip and there is no phone out there. He will call when he is done." It was all I could think of. I mean, how do you tell them Daddy is out where the bad guys are and if he makes it back, he will call you. My respect for the Soldiers who live out in the Red everyday grew exponentially as I hung up the phone.
I grabbed my gear, threw it on and ran to my trailer. In a blur I grabbed what I would need for four days in the field and threw it on my bed. A quick glance at the computer showed me that my Wife was on with her web-cam ready. (I HAD to see her before I left.) We had one more 'goodbye', blew each other kisses, she told me I looked sexy in my gear (...hey, I had to tell someone.) and we waved good bye. I turned off the computer and in a blur, put half of the stuff I set out in my bag and rushed out the door for the airfield.
I'll give you a second to go back and read that again, to make sure you got the significance of how rushed I was...
...
...there it is...yes, HALF of the stuff I set out. Damn.
I arrived at the airstrip about ten minutes late and rushed in to the office to make sure I was on the manifest. The whole walk over, I was contemplating how upset these officers would be that I was late. I was mad that I was going to make a bad first impression to the team. I was worried that I would screw something up (beyond only packing half my stuff). I knew I would be yelled at for holding things up.
I was the first one there.
As I sat and waited, knowing where I was heading and the realities with such a trip, I began to go through a mental change. The mind begins to focus. External worries and distractions are removed, and placed in a part of the mind that I only go to when I have a spare minute to relax...which is rare on a mission. I found myself thinking about all the different courses of action that may need to be taken, just in case...though I did not fear them. I was reverting to the Infantry training that I had, that I was raised in the Army with...
...I was In The Zone.
SFC NEWMAN
OUT
They say there is no rest for the weary...and this has not been more true in my life than when my Son was first born. Seriously...he didn't sleep for more than ten minutes at a time for the first four days of his precious ADHD filled life. (I should have made the diagnosis then...) My wife was exhausted after FORTY-ONE HOURS of labor, and then being the only one who could breast feed the most hungry child on the planet...well, lets just say we all had seen more restful days.
But that's not what this story is about.
I have lately been in the second most exhausted period of my life...since my Son's first week on planet Earth. It started about a week and a half ago...when I went in to the Palace to start my shift, like usual. When I arrived, I found an E-mail waiting for me.
As the Senior NCO in my section, I have the advantage of being asked to do things that some of the junior soldiers don't get to do. This is both a blessing and a curse. A blessing, because it allows me to do some really cool things out here. A curse because...it allows me to do some really cool things out here.
One of these cool things, as said E-mail explained, is that I get to accompany a team consisting of a Colonel a Major, an SES (which is the civilian version of a General) two translators, and Iraqi Army contingent Consisting of a General and at least two other Field grade (Colonel) officers...as they go all over Iraq and inspect certain Companies within the Iraqi Army.
Note that I am the ONLY Enlisted man to go. This is explained by the SES as follows:
"I want a Senior NCO to go, because they see things that officers don't. They look at things in a way that an officer can't. I also want a Senior NCO with 'operational' experience, and who can represent the United States in a way that impresses the Iraqis and gives us a good face...by the way, how good a shot are you?"
So...after reading the E-mail that said I get to join this distinguished team on their journey to inspect three of the ten Iraqi Army Divisions, and flipping out a little bit...I was told, "Oh...you aren't going, don't worry about it."
It was later that I learned not to listen to things unless they come directly from someone directly involved in the mission. I worked my whole shift...from ten p.m. until five thirty in the morning, when the SES came in. That's when my magical mystery tour began.
"Ready to go?" he asked with a huge smile.
"Huh?" (Well, it sounded like a completely valid response at the time.)
"Yeah, Flight leaves at seven there, so you need to be over at the airfield at six thirty," he explained.
"Um, but I...uh...was told...that, eh...I wasn't going on this one," I eloquently stated. (It was a matter of sheer confusion and lack of sleep that contributed to my outward appearance of over eagerness...)
"Who told you that?" The SES asked. "I said I want you to go...so you are going."
This gave me an hour to leave the palace, walk (or sprint...whatever) the quarter plus mile back to my trailer, pack for a four day trip, let my Wife know I was leaving, get my gear, and get to the airfield another quarter mile walk away. No sweat.
I went down and called my wife immediately. It was not easy, but I think the sudden...no notice technique helped both of us by not giving us time to flip out too much. I was leaving the relative safety of the "Highly Fortified Green Zone" and heading out into the "Red." As I have said before...I don't pretend that I am not much safer here in the Green Zone, and I don't pretend that safe is not comfortable for me and my family.
There was no possible way to tell her how much I love her. There just aren't enough words to do it. I knew she would worry until I could tell her that I was back in the Palace and safe...but that there was nothing I could do to quell that worry.
"What do I tell the kids?" she asked.
"That Daddy loves them, and he is sorry that he can't talk...but he is on a camping trip and there is no phone out there. He will call when he is done." It was all I could think of. I mean, how do you tell them Daddy is out where the bad guys are and if he makes it back, he will call you. My respect for the Soldiers who live out in the Red everyday grew exponentially as I hung up the phone.
I grabbed my gear, threw it on and ran to my trailer. In a blur I grabbed what I would need for four days in the field and threw it on my bed. A quick glance at the computer showed me that my Wife was on with her web-cam ready. (I HAD to see her before I left.) We had one more 'goodbye', blew each other kisses, she told me I looked sexy in my gear (...hey, I had to tell someone.) and we waved good bye. I turned off the computer and in a blur, put half of the stuff I set out in my bag and rushed out the door for the airfield.
I'll give you a second to go back and read that again, to make sure you got the significance of how rushed I was...
...
...there it is...yes, HALF of the stuff I set out. Damn.
I arrived at the airstrip about ten minutes late and rushed in to the office to make sure I was on the manifest. The whole walk over, I was contemplating how upset these officers would be that I was late. I was mad that I was going to make a bad first impression to the team. I was worried that I would screw something up (beyond only packing half my stuff). I knew I would be yelled at for holding things up.
I was the first one there.
As I sat and waited, knowing where I was heading and the realities with such a trip, I began to go through a mental change. The mind begins to focus. External worries and distractions are removed, and placed in a part of the mind that I only go to when I have a spare minute to relax...which is rare on a mission. I found myself thinking about all the different courses of action that may need to be taken, just in case...though I did not fear them. I was reverting to the Infantry training that I had, that I was raised in the Army with...
...I was In The Zone.
SFC NEWMAN
OUT
posted by Unknown at 5:42 AM
2 Comments:
I can hardly wait for part 2. Don't tease us with this for too long before you post part 2. Once again your writing helps me understand wha you are going through over there.
Dad & I love you so much, stay safe
Mom
Good Luck. Thank you to you and your wife for serving our nation.
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